Hi - As I prep this to send in the morning, it feels like a whole month has gone by since I wrote the essay below. But alas, it’s only been 6 days 😆 Here it is, with my second conversation up first.

In this edition I chat with Connor Lewis who creates compelling video work for software companies. He’s created a business and network he’s proud of, but had to power through some doubt to get there. We chat about close calls with giving up, the superpower of a great partner, and his new project with an NFL QB on set.

Follow Connor and his work:

Website — www.studiolewis.video

LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/connor-lewis/

I've had the privilege of two grandfathers and a dad who were/are very handy when it comes to tools, woodworking, DIY projects, etc. I've accumulated evidence of it over the years—built into houses we've lived in, furniture we've used, boxes that keep trinkets, and ornaments that hang on our tree at Christmas.

Of the more notorious items we've moved with us over the past 20 years (and 10 residences) was a small, unassuming wooden box. It's about half the size of a shoebox with a simple handle on the top. But heavy. Which is confusing given the sides are solid and there's nothing to open. Just six wood panels screwed together around something clearly... not wood. It has served as a door stop at one point. It has spent time in closets, pantries, and storage units. Most recently, it's been sitting at the front of our garage on my work bench.

It originally came from my grandpa on mom's side. He gave one each to my brothers and I somewhere around the time I was newly married. He told us what was in it, but challenged that we wait until a certain point in time to do anything with them. This trigger was well-intentioned, but given the state of the world, I'm not sure we'd ever get to it.

Grandpa was a Navy man (Korean war service) and lifer at Caterpillar in Peoria, IL. Built their house with his own two hands. Saved meticulously. As hard-working as they come (just like the rest of my lineage.) First class grilled porkchop and creme de menthe milkshake. The honest to God all American grandfather. (he passed in 2019 and then grandma went this past Christmas to rejoin him)

Today, I rummaged through the stuff on my garage shelf, found the box, and pulled it down onto the floor. This time—for the first time—with a drill in hand. I've spent enough time over the decades knowing it's there. Always subconsciously wondering when I would open it one day. What the circumstances or excitement would be. The arrangement was: when the value of the contents inside were worth double the original amount, we could sell it.

If you read my waiting room account from a few weeks ago, you probably already see where this is heading. So the question is, what's in it. (Do it - in your head right now like Brad Pitt from Seven. "What's in the booooooxx!?")

Clearly, we're not talking diamonds or rubies, what with all the doorstopping it did. No gold or silver either (that's gone at this point). And Bitcoin's definitely not this heavy.

From 1999 ~ 2008 the United States Treasury released the Statehood Quarters project, creating a uniquely minted coin for each of the 50 states (and more including territories). This sweet, sweet man collected three rolls of quarters for each of the 50 states over that time and sealed each set in a wooden box, complete with handle, to keep over the years. It wasn't until today that I realized he had also labeled each and every role with the state name and order it was released in the collection. Tiny strips of paper in his handwriting scotch-taped around each $10 roll.

So, first it was jewelry. Now, quarters. How in God's name have I fallen so far from the tree? Here I am in my mid forties having to unload rolls of quarters because of the squeeze our circumstances have us in. And now I'm spending time writing about the trauma instead of... working?

(Fwiw, there's a check on the way—I just had no idea the process would take this long to close out a 401k. Yes, that thing that every financial advisor and accountant tells you not to do. It's happening next. But it’s ok we have two of them, lol.)

For whatever reason, I turned out not to be a military man or steadfast engineer. I'm wired so vastly different from who he was. And I'm living in a world that looks and feels a whole lot different as well. But my story clearly has a mind of its own, windy path included, and that's why I'm sharing it here.

Last night my wife showed me a post about the Savannah Bananas origin story. How founders Jesse and Emily Cole overdrafted their account in 2016, months before the first game. They sold their house and slept on an air mattress in a garage to get through. After re-launching a few months later as the Savannah Bananas, they proceeded to sell out every game since that first season and have become what some consider to be a brand on its way to $1B.

I have mixed feelings about stories like these. I think it's amazing and I honestly couldn't be happier for them. But today I'm sitting here wondering how the fuck I'm gonna turn these quarters into bananas. Is there really anything so valuable I can create using those precious hours I just bought myself? And if I don't figure out something that pays me back (and fast), am I going to be a disgrace to grandpa for using them just to get by in an unremarkable and defeating season of life?

Good God, who's idea was this essay thing. I did not realize the size of the demons and drama when I started this six weeks ago. But I know we're not alone in terms of people experiencing that punch in the gut feeling constantly. Life is so, SO hard for many right now. If it's not money, it's almost definitely something else. In this case, here are the redeeming factors I'm choosing to hang onto:

In a blink, we'll presumably have grandkids of our own. Quarters will be long gone from the currency equation I'm sure. But rather than look at this as a loss, I'm going to focus on what I can refill that box with one day that's worth passing down. Maybe it'll be some form of monetary relic. (Line it with copper, aluminum, and nickel as a homemade Faraday cage with a crypto dongle in it?) Or maybe it'll be something we don't even know exists yet. Something our story hasn't revealed at this point.

Whatever the case, it's not over and it isn't lost. I highly doubt it was grandpa's plan 20+ years ago to work this way, but I just happened to find 2,000 tokens when we needed them. Next level ahead.

-Justin

PS: here's what the actual math is on the value of those quarters. There's a sick part of me that thinks "If you just knew how to make money, look what you could have done with this (and more)." But that’s not helpful. It's just another dimension of looking at the story. I'm not good at making money. I'll have to settle for good at making sad memories for now.

Since 2006, the quarters themselves have lost 39% of their value as cash due to inflation. (so, in reality I deposited more like $307)

If I would have invested it at the earliest opportunity in any of these companies along the way over the past 20 years, here's what it would be worth today:

Berkshire Hathaway - $4,000 (8x)
Google - $19,160 (38x)
Apple - $61,000 (122x)
Amazon - $76,600 (153x)

Ethereum - $3.7 Million (based on Aug 7, 2015)

Bitcoin - $835 Million (based on July 14, 2010)

It's ok. I'll take my box. 🤎